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Of quarts and pint pots


Look, I know that for me to take lofty, pompous issue with the syntax of room-temperature IQs on Facebook is an unfair contest, lazily shooting fish in a barrel. Nevertheless, occasionally something there will cross my desk and demand to be shared with a wider audience. Just how big was this wheelchair? The iffy (well, absent) punctuation leaves it tantalisingly unclear whether it contained the whole of Melbourne, or merely the pub.

Two thoughts sprang to mind when I saw that. First, there was a 1966 novelty song, The Eggplant that Ate Chicago, by Dr. West’s Medicine Show and Junk Band, whose name was significantly longer than their career. You can’t even call them a one-hit wonder as Eggplant wasn’t a hit, but it did have quite a catchy refrain. Second, I had an immediate vision of Mick ‘Crocodile’ Dundee reaching slowly behind his back and saying, “That’s not a wheelchair. THAT‘s a wheelchair”.


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